Just before Shabbat was ready to begin, God was prepared to kick them out of the Garden. Adam and Eve were really frightened. When they were created, the sun was yellow and high in the sky. Now it was blood red and sinking toward the horizon. They were terrified because they believed God was punishing them. They thought God was uncreating the world, and they would be in darkness forever.
Just as God got ready to kick them out of the Garden, Shabbat stepped in. She said, “You promised me that I would not be alone. Everyone else has a partner. Sunday has Monday. Tuesday has Wednesday. Thursday has Friday. Only I am alone. You promised me that Israel would he with me. If you kick Adam and Eve out of the Garden before they experience this Shabbat, Israel will never know how wonderful I can be. I will be too much effort, because they will not know my reward.”
God agreed. “Adam and Eve can spend this Shabbat in the Garden.
Then they have to leave, but they will be with you again each week.”
(Shabbat is in exile with us; the Shechinah is in exile with us --
it’s the only way we can survive this exile from the divine source.)
THERE ONCE WAS A MAN who wanted his fighting rooster to be more ferocious. He took the rooster to a trainer. In a few weeks’ time he returned and saw that his rooster didn’t squawk as loudly.
“Not ready yet,” said the trainer. Two weeks later he saw that his rooster barely raised his neck feathers and wings.
“Not ready yet,” said the trainer. Another week passed. His rooster looked as tame and docile as a chick.
“You’ve ruined my fine fighting bird!” screamed the man at the trainer.
“Not at all,” the trainer replied, “See how calm and secure he is, how serenely strong he stands today. The other fighting birds take one look at him and they all run away!”
A MAN WAS CHASED off a cliff by a tiger. He fell, and just managed to hold onto a branch. Six feet above him stood the tiger, snarling. A hundred feet below, a violent sea lashed fierce-looking rocks. To his horror, he noticed that the branch he was clutching was being gnawed at its roots by two rats. Seeing he was doomed, he cried from the depths of his soul, “O Allah, save me!”
He heard a Voice reply, “Of course, my son, of course I will save you. But first, let go of the branch!”
Don't tell me - you've heard this one…
THE TAILORING BUSINESS was so bad that Feitelberg said to his partner, "Oy, only the Messiah could help us."
"How could even the Messiah help us?" asked the partner in despair.
"Stands to reason," said Feitelberg, "he'd bring back the dead, and naturally they'd all need new clothes."
"Sure," the partner observed gloomily. "But some of the dead are tailors."
"So what?" asked Feitelberg, waving a hand. "They wouldn't have a chance! How many would know this year's styles?"
The Sinner and the Saint
A RICH MAN died in a certain town. He had been an extravagant drunkard and lecher. Nonetheless, the entire community mourned his death and followed his hearse to his last resting place. What wailing, what a lamentation, was heard as his coffin was lowered into the grave! No one could remember when a rabbi or sage had ever departed this life amidst such general sorrow.
It chanced that on the following day another rich man died in the town. He was just the opposite of the first in character and manner of living. He kept to himself and dined on practically nothing but dry bread and turnips. He had been pious all the days of his life and sat all the time in the House of Study poring over the Talmud. Nonetheless, no one except his own family mourned his death. His funeral passed almost unnoticed, and he was laid to rest in the presence of only a handful.
A stranger, who happened to be visiting in the town at the time, was filled with wonder, and asked: "Explain to me the riddle of this town's strange behavior. It honors a drunkard yet ignores a saint!"
To this one of the townsmen replied: "Yes, the rich man who was buried yesterday was a drunkard, but he was easy-going and merry, and loved all the good things in life. Practically everybody in this town profited from him. He'd buy wine from one, chickens from another, geese from a third, and cheese from a fourth. And, being kindhearted, he'd pay well. That's why he is missed and we mourn after him. But of what earthly use was that other one, the saint, to anybody? He lived on bread and turnips and no one ever made a kopek on him. Believe me, no one will miss him!"
A DISCIPLE INTERRUPTED MULLA NASRUDIN’S sermon on teaching stories and rudely said, “You are talking all nonsense. I cannot understand head or tail of what you are saying. And your so-called “teaching stories” are at best poor jokes – they don’t make sense or have any meaning.”
Mulla Nasrudin calmly removed the diamond studded gold ring on his finger, politely called the man, gave him the ring and told him, “ Go outside to the roadside stalls and ask them the cost of this ring - for how much will they will buy this ring. I want to sell it for 100 rupees. Don’t sell it for less than 100 rupees.”
The disciple returned after some time and angrily said, “You have made me a laughing stock. No one is prepared to pay 100 Rupees for this ring. They say this ring is not worth more than ten rupees.”
Mulla Nasrudin then told the man, “Now go to the best jeweller in town and ask him.”
After some time the man returned dumbfounded, “Mulla, I just can’t believe it – the jeweller paid 200 rupees for your ring.”
Mulla Nasrudin looked the man in the eye and said, “Just as only a good jeweller can understand the true value of a ring, only the truly wise man can understand the true meaning of stories.”
